A thought on the past years' LGBTQI movement. I have been blessed to discuss the problems and solutions of the GLBTQI population with compassion, understanding, and acceptance.
Recent events have left me troubled, as I have witnessed the once-oppressed becoming the oppressors. In the past, gay men were shamed by society and church. They were told their behavior was wrong and evil and they were excluded (and worse) from participating in mainstream society.
Now, LGBTQI people have spoken out against their mistreatment. This is good. I celebrate this healing action.
What is troubling to me is that, when I (and my church), publicly announce that we will not accept GLBTQI behavior, the response is that they now shame us. We are now evil and unnatural, and they shun us.
While this may be a natural reaction, and justifiable, it is not productive. Instead of accepting our efforts to include and recognize legitimate complaints, they choose to do unto us what harm we have done to them. And so the cycle continues.
5 comments:
From what I've read and seen, I think the problem is not that the LGBTI folks expected the Church to accept their marriages, but rather that many people, gay or straight (yes, I include myself here), are shocked and hurt at the new policy directed at the children of gay people. When children are attacked or targeted, people lash out.
I suspect that if the new policy had treated children of married gay couples the way the children of murderers, adulterers, drug addicts, porn addicts, thieves, rapists, etc. are treated, then their would have been far less of a negative reaction -- or possibly little reaction at all. For example, I know children of 3 temple-married couples (you know one of these families as well) where in each case, the father committed adultery repeatedly. Two of the married couples stayed together anyway, one split up. But in all three cases, no one ever condemned or discriminated against the children for their fathers' choices, and all of these kids were allowed to grow up in the Church and participate fully. I suspect that if that gay couples would not object if the Church continued to condemn them, but to differentiate between how their kids are treated and how the kids of other couples who are not exactly living like the ideal LDS family are treated was upsetting. (I admit it has upset me, even though I'm straight and it doesn't affect me directly at all.)
It's fine if you don't agree with me, but this is how I'm seeing what's happening right now.
Hope you find some peace over this. :)
I had a problem with that part of the policy as well. The additional statement that was issued a day or so ago helped clarify the issue. This is the statement that helps me the most:
"As always, local leaders may request further guidance in particular instances when they have questions."
And also: "Decisions ... made by local leaders [should be] with their prime consideration being the preparation and best interests of the child.
All children are to be treated with utmost respect and love. ..."
The other issue I had was the fact that they singled out the children of same sex couples. Certainly a policy could be made regarding children of parents who are heterosexual but nevertheless living in a manner not in compliance with church doctrine. It may be that the current policy and/or practices are sufficient for managing these situations. And, while I understand that the focus on same sex families is driven by legal necessity, I would feel better if the Church made more specific policies about more than just the same-sex relationship community.
I know that the church is responding out of a legal necessity. And, while I can see that Church policy regarding baptizing children in other family relationships that are not compatible with the Gospel
but then of course they are singling out even more children, so perhaps that isn't a better solution either. Perhaps the Church really did think this out and chose the least of the necessary evils ...
Yes, it's a bit prickly all the way around. It's been on my mind ever since it was announced.
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